You were cushion dimples and
creased white sheets,
forgotten books under a canopy bed.
We slept back to back
Our little fortress in tact
But with no intimacy.
Rushing through chapters
Just a quick page turn
before the happy ending with somebody else.
The stay or go…
Be sweltering hot or freeze?
Let’s sit on the fence for years.
The tensed arm around my shoulders
The cliché in the movie theatre
My too-high pitched giggle
The smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes,
That I love you kiss that felt more like you are comfortable to me.
The familiar taste of coffee on your mouth,
We kissed with eyes open.
It wasn’t love that we had and we knew it.
It wasn’t anything, anymore.
But why do I still stay with you, when it’s true you’re not really the one?
And why don’t I just keep on looking for him?
Because once I found him, but now he is gone.